Sunday, not Saturday...The vast anti-efficiency conspiracy...Help wanted...

Well, it's Sunday, not Saturday. That makes me one day late with this blog update.

That's because I've been victimized by the vast anti-efficiency conspiracy that has undermined the efforts of countless freelance writers over the decades.

***Former full-time employer/friend needs emergency assistance. Two television and one radio interview later, I find myself pulled out of semi-retirement for a day to "hold down the fort" at the old job site.

***Bubbly, fun, tough, laughing, dancing, silly, Energizer Bunny-channeling almost-three-year old emerges from bedroom at midnight, crying. "Daddy, I choked-ed." Translation: "I puked." Bedding changed. Second round of vomiting follows. Bedding changed. Child currently watching "Doodlebops," eating Pedialyte popsicle and proclaiming that she needs "to sleep a little bit." Pistol-hot forehead and sneezing also involved.

***Former high school friend, unseen since approximately 1989, emerges and just so happens to be in town this evening. Unlikely to happen again any time soon. Obligatory get-together on tap. What's that in the background? "Tick tock tick tock tick tock." Oh, yeah, it's that damned clock reminding me of looming deadlines.

***Dental surgery approaches. Full anesthesia, subsequent pain (hopefully less than current pain) coming right up! Not excited about (a) the tick tocks that will pass during surgery/recovery, (b) prospect of straw-delivered diet. That's a joke. I should be able to eat. After a day or two.

That's the conspiracy.

HELP WANTED

I had an arrangement with a really talented writer. I paid this individual on a monthly basis for work on various web content projects. Said writer, however, opted to move in a different direction and we (quite amiably) ended the deal.

I could use someone else. Here's how it works.

You supply X number of words per month, always with at least two weeks warning. Usually SEO content articles or something similar, although projects may vary. I pay you an agreed upon sum on a monthly basis in exchange for those X words.

Either party can bail out at any time with a couple of weeks warning. It's a loose partnership perfect for someone who wants extra work and who is Extremely Reliable. I like the idea of stable, long-term working relationship.

I'm not big on formality and like to keep it friendly. I need to work with people who tend to respond to emails about projects quickly. Did I mention Extremely Reliable? Good.

Interested? Here's what you do... Send me an email tagged "YOURNAME - Content Work" to contentdonebetter@gmail.com. That's not my regular email address, but it's the one I'm using for this. Let me know...

A. How many words per month you can do. We're talking about general interest topics. Usually articles, conversational style, factually accurate, completely original, well-written, etc. Don't give me a big number if you can't hit it. I'd rather find three people who can actually get stuff done than one who ends up dropping the ball.

B. How much money you'd want to do X words per month.

C. A representative sample or two as an attachment.

I will then follow up with you. It might take a few days due to my war against the clock and circumstance, but I will get back to you. Swear.

This doesn't supplant the occasional job postings and offers I make through WriterWrangler. This is more of an ongoing thing. In fact, I'd be willing to guarantee at least six months of work, probably.

Anyway, that's that.

Now, I have to tend to the sickly, finish an ebook, and perform other tasks on a should-be lazy Sunday.

Speaking of Lazy Sunday, I'd hate to be the last person in the world to link to this comedic gem: